Reasons For Divorce; What Constitutes Viable Reasons For Thinking About Or Wanting A Divorce?

According to the Center for Disease Control's National Vital Statistics Report of 2002, 50% of first marriages ended in divorce and 60% of remarriages end in divorce. But, the Center for Disease Control also found that 96% of Americans express a personal desire for marriage, and almost three-quarters of Americans believe marriage is a life long commitment. I imagine that there are somewhat similar statistics worldwide.

With these kinds of statistics, its easy to see how complex it can be when people think they want a divorce, they have difficulty identifying how a truly viable divorce reason might be defined. Wanting happiness through marriage and wrestling with what may seem an inevitable outcome (a divorce), can be emotionally and mentally challenging. After all, it is human nature to want to feel nurtured and secure, no matter where you live!

So, if you're thinking about getting a divorce, what are truly valid reasons for actually getting a divorce?

Each government has different laws defining the difference between 'fault' and 'no-fault' divorce reasons that have enough merit that allow for the divorce to be granted. While it makes sense for you to keep this in mind when deciding whether or not to get a divorce because there may be financial considerations to think of, you should first focus on defining your own emotional or "personal" divorce reasons, regardless of what the local governing body says.

If you ask 100 people how they define viable reasons for wanting a divorce, you'll most likely get 100 different answers because they'll answer you from their perspective, not yours. Sure, there may be similarities to the way you feel in some of those answers about 'real' divorce reasons, you may even agree with some. But, the real answers to this question can only come from you. You have to figure out what reason or reasons would be viable in your mind in order to actually go through your decision about getting a divorce or staying married.

Some reasons that people give for getting a divorce, or wanting a divorce, are purely selfish and have no substance. An example of a reason for wanting a divorce that has no substance is not liking the fact that your spouse has constant unfounded jealousy. There is a deeper problem that exists here, and in the case of this example, it could be that the spouse who constantly feels jealousy has a confidence problem or some sort of 'fear of loss'. Whatever the case, the divorce reason in this example clearly isn't viable and should relatively easy to fix.

Often times when people give 'surface' or flimsy reasons for wanting a divorce, they really have much deeper feelings about something and they're just using the shallow divorce reason as an avoidance of some kind. Or, they give these 'foundation-less' reasons for wanting a divorce because they actually aren't aware that there are other deeper rooted reasons that are the cause of the way they feel now.

Common reasons that cause people to think about or want to get a divorce:

*Couple has conflicting personal beliefs
*Couple's marital satisfaction decreases
*Desertion
*Adultery
*Cruel treatment
*Bigamy
*Imprisonment
*Spousal Indignities
*Institutionalization
*Irretrievable Breakdown of some kind

Of course, you should add your own reasons to the list for wanting a divorce, better yet, make your own list of what may be 'valid' reasons. Solid divorce reasons for wanting or going through a divorce usually come from some sort of occurrence, behavioral pattern, and/or change in the viewpoint of the marriage itself.

In order to really make a smart divorce decision, you should first list the reasons that you have for wanting a divorce, then examine those divorce reasons for true viability. Then come back to it that list in a day or so. Chances are you will be able to scratch a few of those reasons for wanting a divorce off the list because they were identified purely from an emotional viewpoint rather than logic.

If you are thinking about getting a divorce, and haven't clearly identified what reasons you have for feeling the way you do, you'll be doing yourself a 'dis-service' if you act without carefully examining the viability each designated divorce reason. Everyone has their own reasons for wanting a divorce, make sure that you are certain that your reasons are truthfully viable to you before you act on them.

Author of "A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce", the eBook recommended by counselors to their clients. Proven "Actions Items" to help you decide!
Deciding on Divorce
reasons for divorce

---

Extramarital Affair: Should You Get A Divorce Just Because One Of You Had An Extramarital Affair?

Having to deal with an extramarital affair can be a life-changing event, regardless of whether you stay married or not. Inescapable feelings can come over both people who live through an extramarital affair... Read More

An In-Depth Look at Army Divorce Rates

Raleigh, NC-The largest divorce firm in the state, Rosen Law Firm, says they're not surprised by the sharp increase among Army divorce rates and that more needs to be done to counsel the... Read More

Divorce and the Stock Market

The most recent statistics show that about 50% of all marriages end in divorce. It is not very encouraging to enter into any kind of relationship knowing that it only has a 50/50... Read More

How to Select a Divorce Lawyer

Selecting a divorce lawyer to handle your family law case is a very important decision. The following are a few important criteria to help in finding the right divorce lawyer.Experience and FocusAny divorce... Read More

Anatomy of a Divorce: How it Really Works

The legal divorce vs. your real divorce The legal divorce has very limited concerns: to get a judgment of divorce, you have to make arrangements for your property, your children, and support... Read More

Four Tips to Save You Money in a Divorce Case

1. Have an Clear Written Fee AgreementMost experienced and effective divorce attorneys charge by the hour and require an advance retainer (or deposit) that is paid at the beginning of the case. Fees... Read More

Too Many Divorces

My oldest boy asked me something the other day about all the news regarding the high divorce rate. I told him there aren't too many divorces, there's too many marriages. Most people get... Read More

Divorce Online Sevice - Why Should We Lose Money And Time Applying For Divorce?

Attempts to use the worldwide Web as an effective means of struggle against bureaucracy are undertaken constantly and sometimes successfully. Today it is possible to fill in a tax declaration, apply for bankruptcy... Read More

Hidden Divorce Costs

Divorce has become part of life in the 21st century. The stigma of being divorced that once existed no loger exists. This does not mean that divorce is an easy decision to make.... Read More

Divorce and Uncle Sam: Top 10 Things You Should Know When Filing Your Taxes

1. What is my filing status? (Married, Single, Head of Household) Marital standing at year end determines your filing status for the entire year. If you have a decree of divorce or separate... Read More

Divorce: Secrets To Coping With A Divorce Announcement

During a wedding ceremony, when people are joined together in matrimony, they swear and vow to honor and respect each other and to remain partners both during good and bad times.But in most... Read More

Divorce--How the Legal System Works Against You

If there were no legal system, no lawyers and no courts, divorce would still be difficult and it would still take time to go through it. Divorce is at least a major crossroad... Read More

The Job of a Divorce Attorney

Marriage is a very solemn and serious chapter on any person's life. However, due to personal reasons, a couple may decide to call everything off and file a divorce. Divorce, or dissolution, as... Read More

Cheating Husbands - Meeting Needs?

Husbands cheat on their wives for many reasons. They could be bored with their lifestyle and feel that they need to do something exciting or they could be having a midlife crisis. The... Read More

Divorce Articles: How To Get The Most From A Divorce Article

There are many types of divorce articles available on the Internet by a variety of authors. What's below will help you get the most out of the divorce articles here on this site... Read More

Alienation of Affection - Interference with marriage can cost big bucks in North Carolina

Non-lawyers are often surprised to learn that a spouse can sue for money damages in North Carolina based on allegations of emotional harm caused by a third party to the marital relationship. These... Read More

Divorce, The Hardest Thing You Have To Do

Knowing What To Do In DivorceKnowing what to do when you are faced with a divorce is often hard to figure out. But, you can and you will get through it. First, you... Read More

Coping With Divorce Anger

Successfully releasing your anger will help you begin healing after your divorce. Right now you may feel a great deal of rage at your ex-husband. You might be thinking that if it weren't... Read More

Divorce--Overcoming the Obstacles to Agreement: Ten Steps

You're going to want to be working on your divorce agreement outside the legal system, because the things you can do to help yourself outside the legal system are far more effective than... Read More

Deciding on Divorce: How to Know You are Making the Right Choice

It's a well known fact that in this day and age most marriages end up in divorce. When confronted with the possibility of "throwing a relationship away", you'll probably experience a lot of... Read More

How Can Collaborative Law Be Beneficial In Your Texas Divorce?

Collaborative law is based on the realization that the commitment by the parties in a family is that it is in their best interest to avoid going to trial.This process relies on open... Read More

Divorce: How To Survive A Divorce And Move On With Your Life

One out of every two marriages in America is failing.American families are crumbling and vanishing.Most families have become dysfunctional, and it is widely becoming fashionable to come from a dysfunctional family.Divorce is on... Read More

How Thinking About An Uncontested Divorce Figures Into Your Decision About Divorce

An uncontested divorce is the most common type of divorce. An uncontested divorce is a divorce that occurs when there are no disagreements between spouses over divorce related issues like custody, finances, living... Read More

Stop Divorce: Should You Try To Stop Your Divorce If Youre Just Thinking About Getting A Divorce?

Thinking about getting a divorce doesn't necessarily mean that you should try to stop your divorce. Conversely, it could be wise to try to s top your divorce, only you know whether you... Read More

Rebuilding Your Life from the Ashes

One peculiar feature of a stepfamily is that they are built on a negative foundation. A stepfamily couple comes to their new home with a full set of baggage, containing memories, wounds, and... Read More

9 Steps to Regaining Self-Esteem After Divorce

Divorce is difficult at the 'best' of times. Even when a couple makes a combined decision to divorce, it can be extremely trying.What happens if the decision is one sided? What happens to... Read More

Is Your Marriage Problem Severe Enough To Warrant Getting A Divorce?

Having a marriage problem can be agonizing especially if you're trying to do all you can to make your marriage work. Depending on how your marriage was prior to thinking that you had... Read More

A Time of Grief and Healing After Separation and Divorce

I thought I would never feel the light of life again when I realized that my marriage was going to end. In fact I went through a painful year of not knowing if... Read More

Choosing Your Divorce Method

The biggest mistake that people make when getting divorced is that they fail to plan. They simply decide to leave the relationship and then enter and ugly and expensive battle that ends up... Read More