Good Grief!

If tears are an indication of how special my relationship with my mother was, I cry with pride! I've come to see grief as pain with a purpose. Interestingly enough, as I cared for my mother in my home the last several weeks of her life, much of what I had learned through spiritual teachings about death had gone out the window. It seemed as though I were losing her forever! At times, I wallowed in sadness and self-pity.

Living life in slow motion, I gazed off into my own inner space, sobbed, and occasionally argued with that part of my mind that did not want my mother to go. Even what I had learned about self-care was not accessible to me since I seemed to exist 'in a fog.' I wasn't getting enough sleep and I felt scared and alone; but not for long!

I finally came to rest on the spiritual foundation that has carried me this far in life. What a respite those teachings became as I was able to see my grief as a journey of spiritual unfoldment. Grief is a normal and natural reaction to loss yet our society seems to hurry along the feelings around transitions that take time to heal. We grieve what could have been and what we feel 'should' have been, along with not being able to see our loved one again, on Earth anyway!

The grief that I felt was really just me focusing on the idea that her life was ending. Using Spiritual principles, I was able to then focus on the truth, which is that Spirit, which is who we really are, is eternal! She too, would live on?

I feel like a large part of me died along with my mother. Maybe it was a part of me that was ready to be put at rest. Her death has created a void in me that I can choose to fill as I'd like. As I open up even more to greater spiritual understanding, I am learning to trust the whole process of life, including death.

I have come to see this "mourning after" as a time to heal, to heal unprocessed sadness in my life, including disappointments from relationships, jobs ending sooner than I would have liked, losing beloved pets, and moving from town to town as I grew up. There are opportunities inherent in life's changes that are a gateway to greater personal and spiritual growth. The dynamics of change can be stepping stones to open up to the fullness of God's love.

I received a card from a friend that said, "When the sea recedes, many treasures and gifts appear that otherwise never would have been noticed." From a metaphysical or symbolic perspective, I can look at my mother's death as being the sea receding. Her death, part of the natural ebb and flow of life, brought me many gifts.

Grieving the loss of my mother involved surrender. There came a point where I had to let go and let God, and what a blessing that was! I gradually remembered all that I had been taught around eternal life and the truth that she reemerged into pure positive energy as she "went home" to God. Another gift I was reminded of when, through "coincidence" I ended up in the office of a wonderful spiritual therapist, is that we are always being guided and we are never alone. Perhaps my grief is just God's love washing over me. I can't seem to get away from God's goodness!

It is her death that inspires me to move forward and get clear about what I would like to experience in the next stage of my life. Similar to her spiritual ascension, I feel that I am reemerging into the rest of my life with a more grounded belief in the idea that the Loving Intelligence that created us and all of life is ever present, guiding and directing our ways.

God, you are the love that washes away what no longer serves me. During this time of grief, I ask that you wash away any limiting belief I have that would hold me back.

Diana Kennedy is committed to assisting others in transforming their lives from the inside out! She is an inspirational speaker and writer. Diana is the author of Living from Spirit website and E zine. She is the Ministerial Assistant at Unity of Tallahassee where she leads the early service, classes and workshops. Diana is a licensed massage therapist working at All About You! Massage where she specializes in Relaxation/Deep Tissue massage and spiritual energy balancing. Diana also leads TeleClasses for the Mind*Body*Spirit community. To register or to contact her, call 850-878-2130, visit http://www.dianakennedy.com, or email living_from_spirit@yahoo.com. To subscribe to Living from Spirit ? A Breath of Inspiration, email Living_from_Spirit-subscribe@yahoogroups. com.

---

Physiological Consequences of Carrying Emotional Trauma

Although many of us carry some form of emotional trauma in our bodies, and therefore in our energy fields, do we ever really stop to question the impact that it is having on... Read More

What this Rabbi Learned from Not being Re-hired

It's a familiar story, and I have been through it before, and so have you. In January the Synagogue Personnel Committee told me that they were recommending that the synagogue not renew my... Read More

Online Memorial ? A Dedication of Love for Your Departed Loved Ones

Life has always been a journey, a journey of finding of one true self and happiness. As however destined, all journeys will eventually find its very own destination and it is inevitable that... Read More

One Stray Tear

The delight lit my face as the couple turned the corner into the hallway where we stood in lively conversation. I threw my arms open wide, ignored the cell phones plastered to their... Read More

When Change Comes (Dealing With Grief and Loss)

Needless to say, the time after loss is volatile and confusing for most people. Unresolved issues come to the fore and questions we have not answered must often be confronted. Along with a... Read More

Miracles?

If we were to organize a list of the thorniest problems for the bereaved, certainly somewhere near the top would be the question of miracles. Everybody has heard anecdotal stories of certain people... Read More

Anticipatory Grief and Ongoing Sadness for Caregivers

In 1969, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross published her famous book; On Death and Dying and later went on to launch the Hospice movement in America. Even though her studies focused more on those who... Read More

The Grief And Belief Connection

"Grief is healing: To take away our grief is to take away our healing. And learning about life after death helps us heal with greater hope, comfort and peace." ~ Bob OlsonIn approximately... Read More

Pet Loss: Significant and Profound Loss or Much Ado about Nothing?

For those who have deeply loved and lost their animal companions, the answer is obvious and yet disturbing. There are still far too many people in our culture who minimize and trivialize the... Read More

The Look of Grief

Never, since man has walked upright, have people all over the globe had more educational advantages or more opportunities to practice advanced social and interpersonal skills. And yet, for the most part, we... Read More

Death of a Parent: Saying Good-Bye to Mommy or Daddy

Coping with the death of a loved one is never easy, regardless of how old you are when that loss occurs. For children who lose a parent, however, the effects can be devastating,... Read More

Euthanasia: How Will I Know When its Time?

Pippin needed assistance from his owner to get to his feet. He slowly walked to the door, then needed help once again to step down onto the back porch. With a slight groan,... Read More

Mexico: Death in Mexico

Death: No thank you. Dying: Gives me a panic attack. Burial: Not today, please. Of all the subjects I could write about, this one is my least favorite. It, in fact, could easily... Read More

Trial by Fire - 9 Tips for Grieving Couples

You will often hear that grief and loss bring couples together, but it can actually do just the opposite. It is possible to emerge on the other side of grief with a closer... Read More

If Ever It Is Me

With my father, his brother and their father having had late onset Alzheimer's I can't help but wonder if someday it will be my fate. This is what I have told my family.If... Read More

Good Grief!

If tears are an indication of how special my relationship with my mother was, I cry with pride! I've come to see grief as pain with a purpose. Interestingly enough, as I cared... Read More

How to Cope with Anticipatory Grief

Anticipatory grief is the name given to the mix of emotions experienced when we are living in expectation of loss and grieving because of it. Anticipatory Grief is particularly relevant to those who... Read More

In the Blink of an Eye

Today's Quote: "My house is burned down, but I can see the sky." Sally Reed, cancer survivorThirty five years ago this weekend, my father died. Killed when the Mack Truck Lear jet he... Read More

After Suicide: Returning to Life, Thanks to an Owl

Have you ever lost the ability to laugh? I did.When Arlyn died, I knew I would never laugh again. After all, my child had taken her own life; she had died by suicide.How... Read More

Grief

If you have ever lost someone dear to you it is likely that you can still summon up the grief that you may still be carrying deep inside yourself as a result of... Read More

Guilty, Your Honor: The Burden of Guilt After a Suicide

Guilty, Your Honor, I whisper.Have you ever done anything so horrible that you would prefer to hide in a dark closet for the rest of your life than have someone find out you... Read More

Grief

I didn't know a heart could die before it stopped beating. I didn't know a life could cease before it stopped breathing.I didn't know how devastation could wend a living soul I didn't... Read More

An Unexpected Letter

It was a couple of weeks after Christmas, and I was standing by my mailbox in the vestibule of the apartment building where I lived in Lexington, Kentucky, holding a letter I had... Read More

The Creative Side of Healing

One of the areas where I seem to be placing most of my focus these days is the relationship between creative expression and healing. Something that I have always found to be particularly... Read More

Adapting to the Loss of a Loved One: Three Tips on how to Cope

Have you ever sat down and played a piano where one of the keys wasn't working? Or made cookies and left out an ingredient? Perhaps you've started listening to a favorite CD, and... Read More

Suicide in the Church Part 1

Recently, several suicides have occurred right here in my own hometown of about 16,000 people. The latest of these involved a friend of mine who was, among other things, the leader of a... Read More

Made in Heaven

Consumed by my loss, I didn't notice the hardness of the pew where I sat. I was at the funeral of my dearest friend - my Mother. She finally had lost her long... Read More

Angel of Comfort... The Story

I am an Angel artist and several weeks ago while listening to the late night news, a news story came on that really touched my heart. On the way home in the wedding... Read More

Beyond A Mothers Nightmare To Radical Forgiveness

It was a moment I will never forget.On February 22, 2003, I was visiting with my son Brian Michael (http://www.BrianMichaelGuthrie.com) at his home in North Carolina, where I had been since... Read More