Top Seven Tips To Become A Good Stepmother

Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most challenging, yet rewarding, experiences in a woman's life.

Every family's circumstances are certainly different in some ways. There are numerous uncontrollable factors, which will inevitably effect your relationship with your stepchildren, like: whether the children have a living biological mother; whether they have any contact with their biological mother; how long ago and why their biological parents are no longer together; etc...

Consider the following seven suggestions to help you be the best stepmom you can be...

1) Remember that they are not YOUR children. You do not automatically become equal to their father in any way - particularly when it comes to discipline, enforcing rules etc... Discuss your role in their lives with their father and then with them. Let him tell them how he expects them to interact with you. (For example: Your husband may say that his children must listen to you just the same as they listen to him... or He may decide that he is the still the primary care-giver, law-maker, rule-enforcer...) Make sure he is fair to you and them, so you do not become the instant "enemy."

2) Make time for your stepchildren. Show an interest in their daily lives - how they're doing in school, what they do after school, their hobbies at home, etc... Get involved with their social life, sporting events, extracurricular activities IF they want you to. Do not try too hard or push yourself into their life. And definitely do not pry into their business.

3) Do not break their trust in you. Develop an open line of communication by talking to them and respecting their wishes. If they ask you not to tell their father something they've shared with you, DO NOT betray their confidence by running to him. (Unless of course, it is something critical that he must know and then ask him not to tell the kids that you were the person who told him...)

4) Be yourself. Develop a totally unique relationship with your stepchildren - in a way that does not try imitate their mother. Do not try to be like her or to replace her.

5) Never talk badly about the children's mother in front of them. Try to establish some level of communication with her if she is still involved in their life. It can help the kids tremendously if you and their mother get along. And it can hurt them deeply if you don't.

6) Have patience. Do not expect miracles to occur overnight. This is not an "instant" happy family... But if you try to make the transition a pleasant one and create an positive living environment, time will do the rest.

7) Remember that you are the "outsider." They did not choose you. Their father did. Their standards are probably extremely rigid. You are the adult. They are children and you have to earn their love and respect.

Resource Box - ? Danielle Hollister (2004) is the Publisher of BellaOnline Quotations Zine - A free newsletter for quote lovers featuring more than 10,000 quotations in dozens of categories like - love, friendship, children, inspiration, success, wisdom, family, life, and many more. Read it online at - http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art8364.a sp

---

Positive Parenting of Teenagers: Helping Your Teen Understand What I Cant Afford It Means

Because most teens have not had the experience of getting to the end of the money before the end of the month, the words, ``I can't afford it,'' have little or no meaning.Here's... Read More

Personal Honor

There are moments in a parent's or grandparent's life, when they receive validation for the way they are living, or, have lived, that life. These moments are usually quiet ones, with no fanfare... Read More

Homeschooling ? Is It Worth It?

Suppose that you rearrange your life to homeschool your child and the experiment fails? You may feel that you've disrupted your life and wasted a year of your child's time. Your child may... Read More

Our Recommended Eating Program for ADHD

Below is a copy of our eating program for Attention Deficit Disorder - ADD ADHD kids. It is not a very strict program, unless you are used to having most meals at your... Read More

Andy Griffith Show Family Lessons

Although it might seem pretty corny to a lot of folks today, the old Andy Griffith Show really did have a lot of common sense family values that we could learn from today.Take... Read More

Parenting Problem? 5 Simple Things That Will Help

What is a parenting problem?Parenting is a tough job, we all know that. Parents face many situations that they are not familiar how to deal with. Is the child's fault? Of course not.... Read More

Helpful Tips for the Adoptive Grandparent

Few things are more completely enjoyable than becoming a grandparent. Grandchildren are one of life's joys, whether they come by birth or via adoption. All grandchildren are loved equally and are equally lovable.When... Read More

Dexedrine, Cylert, and Adderall in the Treatment of ADHD

Dexedrine is not prescribed very often for the treatment of ADHD out here in California, but those patients that we've seen on it have done well. Typically it is prescribed to patients who... Read More

Top Seven Tips To Become A Good Stepmother

Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most challenging, yet rewarding, experiences in a woman's life. Every family's circumstances are certainly different in some ways. There are numerous uncontrollable factors, which... Read More

What Do Chinese Water Torture and Arguing with Children Have in Common?

Imagine yourself lying flat on your back, totally strapped down onto a cold, hard table, unable to move any part of your body. You can't see anything around you because your eyes are... Read More

Crazy Colors Fun Kid Experiment as a Party Activity

Here is an easy, inexpensive and fun kid experiment for your next kid birthday party.This activity, which is strictly speaking a kid science experiment, can be used in any party as entertainment. Even... Read More

Spanking Children

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Results of the Spanking Poll on Rexanne.com: Voters - 233Percentage of readers who do not spank their children: 37%Percentage of readers who spank their children: 62%~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I am completely opposed to spanking. I know... Read More

Whos Your Daddy? How to be a Great Dad in 5 to 7 Minutes

I am a dad. I have been now for over 8 years. And I suppose I don't know just everything there is to know about being a dad, good bad or otherwise.I have... Read More

Secrets from the Classroom: Avoiding Summer Learning Loss

In June, elementary school children across North America cheered as they packed up their bags for the final time, and began a much awaited summer vacation. For many this two-month academic hiatus is... Read More

The Truth Behind Having Children

In the beginning, having children was just a byproduct of sexual instinct. Later it was a means to increase manpower for survival (hunting the mastodon, tilling the fields). It was just a part... Read More

How Public Schools Assault Parents Values

Is there anything wrong with lying, cheating, stealing, shop-lifting, taking drugs, premarital sex, insulting your parents, pornography, irresponsibility, or getting pregnant in junior high school? Not according to the values taught to children... Read More

Life Lessons in a Glass of Beer

It was blisteringly hot last Saturday. As I took that first sip of a cold quality beer I knew it was sure to ease my thirst. However, I never expected that in that... Read More

Meeting The True Needs of Children Diagnosed As ADHD

How should one look upon Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and what is the effective way to aid those who are given this diagnosis? There has been considerable debate as to whether or... Read More

Late Night Adventures with Your Children

Vacations are fun ! Weekends with the family are nice. But, Late Night Adventures are "simply marvelous". If you really want to shine in your child's eyes on a more regular basis-- try... Read More

Are You Frustrated With Public Schools?

Join a growing number of parents and teachers!Fact: Last year, our nation spent over $382 Billion on education. Over 99% was spent on developing "learning environments" - buildings, books, science labs, teachers, sports... Read More

The Symtoms Of Meningitis And Septicaemia

Meningitis is an inflammation of the membranes around the brain and spinal cord. It is caused by either a virus or bacteria.Viral meningitis is usually mild and does not require medical treatment. Bacterial... Read More

For School Success, Dont Coddle Your Kids

Parents want their children to succeed in school. However, sometimes their best intentions are misguided. Attempts to provide children with a wonderful life can, in fact, increase the stress of the entire family.One... Read More

Keeping Kids Safe on the Internet

The biggest trick some child predators' are using these days is to pretend to be a kid, in a kid site chat room.Child predators are talking the lingo, misspelling words, having simple conversations... Read More

Child Communication Skill: Do You Really Know What Your Child Is Saying To You?

Here's the scene of communication with your child: your three-year-old boy is bawling his eyes out. Hurriedly, you run over, and ask "What's wrong?". But no answer is spoken, the tears just keep... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: What Teens Say About Parents

What's hard for teenagersHaving people who don't understand you trying to control you.Parents not understanding the things you have to deal with.Having to deal with school.Being accepted by friends.Having someone really close to... Read More

I WONT DO IT! Tips for Working with the Oppositional Child

"I WON'T DO IT!" "YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"Whether parent or teacher, we have all "been there" and "done that" with a child exhibiting refusal behaviors. Before "losing your cool" and your power as... Read More

Unilateral Disarmament - The First Step to Improving Communications with Your Teenagers

Many times, we are so conditioned in how we speak that we do not realize whether or not we are effectively communicating with our teens. This is especially true when they upset us.To... Read More

7 Things To Teach Your Kids About Money

Did you know that many people retire broke?It's true. After a lifetime of hard work and having earned literally hundreds of thousands of dollars, they end up with nothing.So where did all their... Read More

Effects of Jealousy on Childs Personality

Dear friends here we will charge up our mind with the information of jealousy, Meaning of jealousy, causes of jealousy & effects of jealousy on personality.Meaning- Jealousy is an form of emotional stress.... Read More